For most people, the “self-help” in self-help literature has become a noun rather than a verb. We love to read (and, for that matter, be seen reading) books such as Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*** and Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now. But when it comes to actually putting the authors’ suggestions into practice, we tend to wedge these books back on their shelves somewhere between the yellow pages and the dictionary we just keep for show. I have heard a few explanations for why this is the case, most common among them being over-saturation of the market. Have you ever noticed how the “Self-Help” section of Barnes & Noble is several bookshelves longer than, say, the “Spirituality” section? Indeed, a quick search on Barnes & Noble’s website unturns roughly three times as many results for the former than for the latter (44,824 versus 15,981). Many people believe that the average person has heard so many tips for how to live a better life, from both well-wishers and exploitive advertisements looking to turn a profit, that their brain has simply shut the doors to any new information. But this does not explain why we still buy self-help books, despite the dozens already on our shelves. There are more basic and individual reasons for why we so fervidly read self-help literature and with equal fervor refuse to put their suggestions to use. Self-help books function like placebos in a clinical trial that don’t actually work. We consume them, believing them to be the magical drug that will instantly solve all our ailments, but a week later, we are just as sick as we were before we so eagerly ingested their words. Meanwhile, the experimental group that has taken the bona fide treatment, the therapy that addresses the roots of their problems and changes the chemical composition of their very beings, truly heals. The word “therapy” implies action, and this is certainly the case with our experimental group. You cannot expect a broken ankle to heal simply by visiting the doctor and listening to their advice. You must also follow their advice by resting the injury and slowly, intentionally re-introducing movement to the area. This sounds so obvious when discussing physical ailments. So why is it so hard when we’re talking about mental ailments?
Here are a few reasons I have identified in my own experience and observations:
Self-help books are what you make of them. In reading them, you become a more knowledgeable person and increase the arsenal of possibilities at your command. Wisdom, however, is not the same as knowledge. Wisdom is expressed as applied knowledge. Why stop at being knowledgeable when you can also be wise? As you move forward in your day and into the future, let the advice in this post be more than just advice. Read the word “self-help” as a verb, and actually do something to help yourself.
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